I saw an ad on Yahoo today with a picture of Britney Spears or one of her ilk and a tagline reading, “Be a better celeb fan.” My God, is this something people actually aspire to? Can you go to classes and read self-help books and stuff? I suppose it’s good that there are folks out there with achievable goals.
Wednesday was officially the least eventful Halloween of my life. I did nothing. Well, we did go out for dinner, but I’ve been sick all week, so I mostly just drooped quietly over my saag aloo and sighed a lot. I would have liked to watch a horror film, but SiC doesn’t go in for them at all. I’ve given up trying to make him understand that The Exorcist is one of the best films ever made. Actually we’ve reached a compromise: I’ve stopped haranguing him to watch horror films, and he no longer tries to convince me to watch war films. I’m sure Saving Private Ryan is brilliant, but it will never be watched by me. Nope, not ever. Because, believe it or not, I actually kind of get that World War II was a bad time for all involved without needing graphic visual reminders.
Speaking of films, props to Mimi Smartypants for recommending the Nick and Nora movies. We watched The Thin Man the other day, and now I desperately want to be a wise-cracking, silk-dressing-gown wearing, non-stop martini-swilling detective in the 1930s when I grow up. Don’t you love how in old films, being a complete and utter alcoholic is merely an amusing character trait? Ah, the good old days.
SCENES FROM A ZOO
“Hey, do you want to go to Linton zoo? It’s equidistant between London and Norwich.”
“Is it a big zoo?”
“Um…what’s big?”
“I don’t know. How many zoos have you been to?”
“How many?”
“Yes.”
“Do you count safari parks, or just zoos?”
“Just zoos.”
“What about aquariums? They’re sort of like zoos. Aquatic zoos.”
“No! Zoos! ZOOS! How many zoos have you been to?”
“Um…three. In total.”
“And how big is Linton zoo compared to the ones you’ve been to?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never been.”
BONUS TIP
Did you know that if you consume enough green tea you can actually get a bit of a buzz? Good times! I barely even miss the cocaine anymore! Sigh.