Hi! My name is Robin Smith. Like everyone, I have my strengths and weaknesses. My particular areas of fortitude include
1) belittling others in order to feel better about myself;
2) throwing passive-aggressive temper tantrums;
3) rolling my eyes and sneering; and
4) misdirecting my repressed hostility
...among others. My hobbies include binge drinking, abusing illegal substances, gobbing my gum at people on the Tube (ONE FUCKING TIME, OKAY?), being rude to strangers, squandering my talent (like here, for example) and nitpicking my friends' grammar.
Yessir, I am a winning package. But despite all this, I've somehow managed to sucker someone into marrying me. So take hope, ye miscreants! If I can do it, you can too.
As of Saturday (yes, the Saturday that's four days from today) I'll be Mrs. SiC. And as everyone knows, marriage is hard work and involves a lot of sacrifice. Like spending three hours on Oxford Street shopping for a pair of shoes I'm going to wear once. And also, in this instance, being stuck on my own in Canada for God knows how long waiting for my sodding visa to come through. Immigration is a hassle. I don't recommend it.